I used to work for a Danish company with a couple of US offices. We (the American office) we're given three weeks of paid vacation each year (plus the standard US federal holidays), which was the most I'd ever gotten at a company and felt positively philanthropic in its generosity. My colleagues in Denmark (who occasionally worked out of the US office) got way more, but I understood that it was a cultural difference. What shocked me was when I was laid off and I got zero severance, which I knew wasn't standard in Denmark. I suppose when it comes to international business, executives no matter their cultural background will take advantage of any cost cutting opportunities afforded them. It's not just about culture but actual legislation, enforcement, and consequences. I hope that we'll have that someday here in the US!
Thank you, Marjorie. Your experience really highlights how deep the structural and cultural differences go. It’s true, without legislation and accountability, even well-meaning companies can fall short. I share your hope that change is possible in the U.S., too.
Just left for my annual summer break today. Back end of August. Living in France for 30 years taught me the same lesson as you. Now 63, I don’t yearn for a sabbatical, I’ve taken 2 months off every summer. It helps that i work for myself. I’ve used the time to rest, learn, write, rejuvenate. Do something else, elsewhere and differently. Essential for resilience, renewal and creativity. Enjoy your summer!
This is so inspiring, Avivah. I love the idea of using that time to rest, learn, and do something else, elsewhere, and differently. Wishing you a wonderfully restful and creatively rich summer!
Another great piece, Pamela! And thanks so much for the mention. 🥰
I work for a very generous company that gives unlimited paid time off in the US. But it's almost like a badge of honor not to take it. Other than my maternity leave, June of this year was the first time I took a full week off in nearly 8 years. Meanwhile, many of my coworkers in the UK (who have similar legislation to France) regularly take 2-week vacations. I always think "must be nice!" But never plan one myself 😅
Thank you, Rebecca! I’m so glad you enjoyed the piece, and I really appreciate your comment.
I understand that tension you describe: technically having the time, but feeling like you can’t actually take it. I hope your June break felt restorative, and maybe even the start of a new habit?
Yes, I think it will be! Though I also hope to have better daily practice of restful moments so I'm not just racing to earn time off, like you mentioned.
This resonates! I’m American living in French-speaking Switzerland. It’s taken years to unlearn that one need not apologise for taking vacay , and also that vacations don’t need to be productive or contributing to future better productivity. You’re right that it’s a cultural expectation that needs to be shared by many - when your boss takes three weeks and asks why you don’t, it gives permission! Also the scheduling of the work changes… in the US projects grind on year round with little changes to cadence, whereas here in Europe project timings account for nothing progressing in August. That said- September pace can be intense, but it all evens out!
Thank you, Shannon. Yes, exactly! It really does start from the top, when leaders take real time off, it creates space for others to do the same. And you’re so right about the shift in pace between August and September. It all balances out in the end!
This June was the first time I had taken two weeks off in my working life and let me tell you it was a revelation. I am already planning my next hiatus!
Seriously despite burning out quite spectacularly last year I am still learning how to rest. Properly, without guilt.
Thank you, Lauren! I’m so glad you gave yourself that time, and that it felt like a revelation. It’s wild how much unlearning rest can require. Here’s to more guilt-free breaks ahead.
I live and work in Oregon for a Danish company and I am envious of the summer break my Danish colleagues take (typically 4 weeks during July or August). I take most of my vacations in the fall or winter and I find it challenging to take more than a week at a time. During the past few years I took two 2-week vacations and traveled to Europe in September and December. I felt so much more rested and refreshed than when I took only one week off at a time in prior years.
Thank you so much for sharing this, Jeanne! It’s so interesting to hear how even within international companies, vacation habits can vary so much. I completely agree, taking a full two weeks really does allow your brain to reset in a deeper way. I hope more of us start embracing that rhythm, no matter the season!
Well, as I was reading I just remembered how I was younger (I turn 60) . France was separated in 2 ways of life, those who were thinking the American way was the greatest and others already in the mood you described. I was member of the first team (As you mentioned : answering mail on the beach).
After a long time working hard, 2 burns out and some bad disease installed, I finally realised it was not a good life, it was not life at all !
Then I join the second team 🤭 and I discovered an all new world ! France (should say Europa) has got dark lines to ride of course, but the one you magically described is a fantastic one and it took me a too much time to appreciate.
Thank you so much for sharing this, what a powerful and honest reflection. I’m so moved by your shift from “team one” to “team two” (and the hard-earned wisdom that came with it). It’s true, the version of life I tried to describe isn’t perfect, but there’s something so quietly radical in choosing presence over productivity.
I’m glad it resonated and I hope your vacation in 3 weeks is full of everything team two has taught you to value 😊
As a (former) teacher, I had my summers off. Lest people misunderstand, I was only paid for the 200 days that I worked, so my vacation was not really a paid vacation, though my salary was apportioned in such a manner as to make it feel like a paid vacation… and of course, with teenagers underfoot who needed to be ferried from one activity to the next, a garden to harvest, vegetables to can, and the myriad of projects that we put off until we had time, it didn’t really feel like a vacation. Even the family vacation usually centered around my husband’s business trips so we could take advantage of the free hotel and reimbursed transportation costs… but, to be honest, I find that after the first day of “relaxation”, on a typical vacation, I am bored by the inactivity. I prefer to DO something, than to just sit by the water and watch the waves rolling in. It’s not in my nature to “relax.”
My vacations tend to be educational in nature, we just returned from Tokyo recently and went to all the museums in the area, even those who did not have English translation (the Google Translate app is amazing).
For me, vacation and the sem-retirement state that I currently live, is not the absence of productive work, but the freedom to do the work I enjoy and want to do.
I have become too Americanized to live anywhere but here…
Fran, I really appreciate your take, and I completely relate to not being the type to just lie on a beach all day. I get restless too!
That said, I’ve found that stepping away from whatever we call “work”, even if it’s just for a shift in rhythm or scenery, does something essential for my creativity and my overall perspective. It’s less about inactivity and more about interrupting the usual patterns so that new thoughts (or even just peace) have a little room to show up.
I love what you said about the freedom to do the work you enjoy, I think that’s the dream. And maybe rest, in the broadest sense, is just what lets us keep enjoying it.
Good golly I need this perspective! Thank you. I haven't taken a week off since April 2024 and. I feel it. Self employed in the US, if I don't work, I don't get paid. But "away" is valuable and necessary. Thank you fr confirming this.
Valerie, thank you for sharing this, and I feel you. The pressure of being self-employed in the U.S. is so real… if you stop, the income stops. But yes, “away” is more than a luxury, it’s necessary. I’m so glad this piece helped offer that confirmation. Wishing you real rest soon, even if it’s just a few days.
This speaks to the identity crisis of Americans who believe that they ARE their work and that their inherent worth is from their achievements/productivity/titles. How freeing to know this is not truth! I'm an American and motherhood is what unraveled this thread for me. What a lie we've been fed. In regards to vacation time, most companies in the States don't even offer enough for children's many vacations from school throughout the year and so no true paid rest time is left.
Even living in France, I think motherhood is what really helped me unravel this as well. And funny enough, the legal five weeks of paid vacation here don’t come close to covering school holidays, which add up to nearly sixteen weeks a year.
But, there are systems in place to help fill the gap (centre de loisirs, summer camps, and for some families, grandparents who step in). The centre de loisirs is especially accessible, with rates calculated based on family income. So, overall, I would say there’s more support than in the US. But that’s a whole other conversation 😅
I love your observations about the French way of life. I have family in France and love having access to a window of “a different way of doing things”. At the very least, it offers an awareness that there is choice! I very much enjoy your newsletter, keep going!
Thank you so much, Molly. Truly, it’s comments like yours that keep me going 💛 I love hearing that it resonates, especially from someone who knows France from the inside.
My step mum lives in the south of France and writes about life there - including an amazing project she’s pursuing at the moment exploring the 72 micro seasons. I’ve linked her below in case that’s of interest. She’s a bit Substack shy but she has some amazing work I’m encouraging her to post!
I’m based in the UK and write about happiness which can cover anything from nature to vacation as well as a bit of psychotherapeutic theory. I’m studying that as I move away from a career in documentary production.
Anyway. Nice to meet you, and definitely keep going your stuff is great!
Molly, this is so lovely, thank you again for the kind words and for sharing your stepmum’s work. The 72 micro seasons project is fascinating. I hope she keeps posting! I’m also so intrigued by your own work around happiness, I’ll be following along.
We are 10 days in Nice, France and then 14 days in Provence for lavender and village markets. We decided many years ago that two week vacations were a must ( 1 week doesn’t do it ). This is our longest trip so far but we are slow traveling through the south of France. We are seeing first hand what you describe among the French. We love that way of life and that mindset.
Thank you so much! It sounds like you’re having the most beautiful trip, and I completely agree, one week just isn’t enough. I love that you’re embracing the slower pace and soaking up the French mindset along the way. Enjoy your trip!
I used to work for a Danish company with a couple of US offices. We (the American office) we're given three weeks of paid vacation each year (plus the standard US federal holidays), which was the most I'd ever gotten at a company and felt positively philanthropic in its generosity. My colleagues in Denmark (who occasionally worked out of the US office) got way more, but I understood that it was a cultural difference. What shocked me was when I was laid off and I got zero severance, which I knew wasn't standard in Denmark. I suppose when it comes to international business, executives no matter their cultural background will take advantage of any cost cutting opportunities afforded them. It's not just about culture but actual legislation, enforcement, and consequences. I hope that we'll have that someday here in the US!
Thank you, Marjorie. Your experience really highlights how deep the structural and cultural differences go. It’s true, without legislation and accountability, even well-meaning companies can fall short. I share your hope that change is possible in the U.S., too.
Just left for my annual summer break today. Back end of August. Living in France for 30 years taught me the same lesson as you. Now 63, I don’t yearn for a sabbatical, I’ve taken 2 months off every summer. It helps that i work for myself. I’ve used the time to rest, learn, write, rejuvenate. Do something else, elsewhere and differently. Essential for resilience, renewal and creativity. Enjoy your summer!
This is so inspiring, Avivah. I love the idea of using that time to rest, learn, and do something else, elsewhere, and differently. Wishing you a wonderfully restful and creatively rich summer!
Bouncing off this in elderberries this week Pamela…
Can’t wait to read it, Avivah, I’m honored if this sparked something for Elderberries! Wishing you a beautiful, restorative break.
I’m a sucker for extreme moderation.
Another great piece, Pamela! And thanks so much for the mention. 🥰
I work for a very generous company that gives unlimited paid time off in the US. But it's almost like a badge of honor not to take it. Other than my maternity leave, June of this year was the first time I took a full week off in nearly 8 years. Meanwhile, many of my coworkers in the UK (who have similar legislation to France) regularly take 2-week vacations. I always think "must be nice!" But never plan one myself 😅
Thank you, Rebecca! I’m so glad you enjoyed the piece, and I really appreciate your comment.
I understand that tension you describe: technically having the time, but feeling like you can’t actually take it. I hope your June break felt restorative, and maybe even the start of a new habit?
Yes, I think it will be! Though I also hope to have better daily practice of restful moments so I'm not just racing to earn time off, like you mentioned.
Yes! A European style siesta or apéro moment, perhaps?
100% It was hard to wrangle a 4 and 5 year old into a siesta, but I made it work!
This resonates! I’m American living in French-speaking Switzerland. It’s taken years to unlearn that one need not apologise for taking vacay , and also that vacations don’t need to be productive or contributing to future better productivity. You’re right that it’s a cultural expectation that needs to be shared by many - when your boss takes three weeks and asks why you don’t, it gives permission! Also the scheduling of the work changes… in the US projects grind on year round with little changes to cadence, whereas here in Europe project timings account for nothing progressing in August. That said- September pace can be intense, but it all evens out!
Thank you, Shannon. Yes, exactly! It really does start from the top, when leaders take real time off, it creates space for others to do the same. And you’re so right about the shift in pace between August and September. It all balances out in the end!
This June was the first time I had taken two weeks off in my working life and let me tell you it was a revelation. I am already planning my next hiatus!
Seriously despite burning out quite spectacularly last year I am still learning how to rest. Properly, without guilt.
Thank you, Lauren! I’m so glad you gave yourself that time, and that it felt like a revelation. It’s wild how much unlearning rest can require. Here’s to more guilt-free breaks ahead.
Absolutely, next on the list is not feeling guilty if I need an afternoon nap 😂 wish me luck!
I live and work in Oregon for a Danish company and I am envious of the summer break my Danish colleagues take (typically 4 weeks during July or August). I take most of my vacations in the fall or winter and I find it challenging to take more than a week at a time. During the past few years I took two 2-week vacations and traveled to Europe in September and December. I felt so much more rested and refreshed than when I took only one week off at a time in prior years.
Thank you so much for sharing this, Jeanne! It’s so interesting to hear how even within international companies, vacation habits can vary so much. I completely agree, taking a full two weeks really does allow your brain to reset in a deeper way. I hope more of us start embracing that rhythm, no matter the season!
Well, as I was reading I just remembered how I was younger (I turn 60) . France was separated in 2 ways of life, those who were thinking the American way was the greatest and others already in the mood you described. I was member of the first team (As you mentioned : answering mail on the beach).
After a long time working hard, 2 burns out and some bad disease installed, I finally realised it was not a good life, it was not life at all !
Then I join the second team 🤭 and I discovered an all new world ! France (should say Europa) has got dark lines to ride of course, but the one you magically described is a fantastic one and it took me a too much time to appreciate.
But just now, I will be on vacation in 3 weeks 🤣
Thank you so much for sharing this, what a powerful and honest reflection. I’m so moved by your shift from “team one” to “team two” (and the hard-earned wisdom that came with it). It’s true, the version of life I tried to describe isn’t perfect, but there’s something so quietly radical in choosing presence over productivity.
I’m glad it resonated and I hope your vacation in 3 weeks is full of everything team two has taught you to value 😊
As a (former) teacher, I had my summers off. Lest people misunderstand, I was only paid for the 200 days that I worked, so my vacation was not really a paid vacation, though my salary was apportioned in such a manner as to make it feel like a paid vacation… and of course, with teenagers underfoot who needed to be ferried from one activity to the next, a garden to harvest, vegetables to can, and the myriad of projects that we put off until we had time, it didn’t really feel like a vacation. Even the family vacation usually centered around my husband’s business trips so we could take advantage of the free hotel and reimbursed transportation costs… but, to be honest, I find that after the first day of “relaxation”, on a typical vacation, I am bored by the inactivity. I prefer to DO something, than to just sit by the water and watch the waves rolling in. It’s not in my nature to “relax.”
My vacations tend to be educational in nature, we just returned from Tokyo recently and went to all the museums in the area, even those who did not have English translation (the Google Translate app is amazing).
For me, vacation and the sem-retirement state that I currently live, is not the absence of productive work, but the freedom to do the work I enjoy and want to do.
I have become too Americanized to live anywhere but here…
Fran, I really appreciate your take, and I completely relate to not being the type to just lie on a beach all day. I get restless too!
That said, I’ve found that stepping away from whatever we call “work”, even if it’s just for a shift in rhythm or scenery, does something essential for my creativity and my overall perspective. It’s less about inactivity and more about interrupting the usual patterns so that new thoughts (or even just peace) have a little room to show up.
I love what you said about the freedom to do the work you enjoy, I think that’s the dream. And maybe rest, in the broadest sense, is just what lets us keep enjoying it.
Good golly I need this perspective! Thank you. I haven't taken a week off since April 2024 and. I feel it. Self employed in the US, if I don't work, I don't get paid. But "away" is valuable and necessary. Thank you fr confirming this.
Valerie, thank you for sharing this, and I feel you. The pressure of being self-employed in the U.S. is so real… if you stop, the income stops. But yes, “away” is more than a luxury, it’s necessary. I’m so glad this piece helped offer that confirmation. Wishing you real rest soon, even if it’s just a few days.
This speaks to the identity crisis of Americans who believe that they ARE their work and that their inherent worth is from their achievements/productivity/titles. How freeing to know this is not truth! I'm an American and motherhood is what unraveled this thread for me. What a lie we've been fed. In regards to vacation time, most companies in the States don't even offer enough for children's many vacations from school throughout the year and so no true paid rest time is left.
Even living in France, I think motherhood is what really helped me unravel this as well. And funny enough, the legal five weeks of paid vacation here don’t come close to covering school holidays, which add up to nearly sixteen weeks a year.
But, there are systems in place to help fill the gap (centre de loisirs, summer camps, and for some families, grandparents who step in). The centre de loisirs is especially accessible, with rates calculated based on family income. So, overall, I would say there’s more support than in the US. But that’s a whole other conversation 😅
I love your observations about the French way of life. I have family in France and love having access to a window of “a different way of doing things”. At the very least, it offers an awareness that there is choice! I very much enjoy your newsletter, keep going!
Thank you so much, Molly. Truly, it’s comments like yours that keep me going 💛 I love hearing that it resonates, especially from someone who knows France from the inside.
My step mum lives in the south of France and writes about life there - including an amazing project she’s pursuing at the moment exploring the 72 micro seasons. I’ve linked her below in case that’s of interest. She’s a bit Substack shy but she has some amazing work I’m encouraging her to post!
I’m based in the UK and write about happiness which can cover anything from nature to vacation as well as a bit of psychotherapeutic theory. I’m studying that as I move away from a career in documentary production.
Anyway. Nice to meet you, and definitely keep going your stuff is great!
https://open.substack.com/pub/figtart/p/welcome-to-a-cevenol-garden-in-72?r=df5cr&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false
Molly, this is so lovely, thank you again for the kind words and for sharing your stepmum’s work. The 72 micro seasons project is fascinating. I hope she keeps posting! I’m also so intrigued by your own work around happiness, I’ll be following along.
We are 10 days in Nice, France and then 14 days in Provence for lavender and village markets. We decided many years ago that two week vacations were a must ( 1 week doesn’t do it ). This is our longest trip so far but we are slow traveling through the south of France. We are seeing first hand what you describe among the French. We love that way of life and that mindset.
Thank you so much! It sounds like you’re having the most beautiful trip, and I completely agree, one week just isn’t enough. I love that you’re embracing the slower pace and soaking up the French mindset along the way. Enjoy your trip!
As a reward for your francophilia you are awarded this short story starring the dim French detective Tictocq, aka TikTok. You are welcome.
https://clarkaardvark.substack.com/p/tictocq-awakes-35